What’s up with the world and being poor? It’s like a thing that people ‘admire’ and ‘pity’ (in a good way). My family are now watching a documentary/movie about a poor boy from Brazil, from a small poor town in Brazil and how he made it out to become one of the best African-Brazilian soccer players.
This is not the first movie I’ve seen made about someone’s poor life and how they worked hard and struggled and then became successful or something. This seriously annoys me. It’s like glorifying beggars. Yes, I do get that they’ve worked hard and it could be an inspirational story and all that, but WTF. So they’re ‘glorified’ and in a way, ‘praised’ for their success just because they’re poor? So what if I’m middle class or slightly rich and I achieve similar results? Do I get the same kind of admiration or attention or praise?
What’s up with all the ‘poorness’. Everyone wants to make their story worse and more suffering so that the contrast to their glorious lives would be a huge one and people would be wowed and admire them.
Not just movies, but also in real life. My Psychiatrist last time roughly mentioned than he came from a poor family who lives in public housing when he was young, and now he’s a doctor and he’s making lots of money. And he’s middle class or even rich. My mom was like that too. So was my dad. And because of that my mom respects him more and couldn’t stop telling people about it. I’ve already heard her say that ‘doctor story’ twice.
She keeps saying, ‘oh you’ve never experienced poor, so you don’t know how to appreciate things’ or ‘you’ll never understand what poor is like. Back in the day blah blah blah blah…’ or ‘we were poor and we worked hard to get here, we know what real hard work is like, your generation will never understand’.
Well, it’s not MY fault that I’m in this family and I’m not poor enough to understand what poor is. It’s suppose to be a good thing that I’m not poor, but she’s making it a negative and saying that I’m not good enough because I’m not poor. Because I’m not poor, I don’t work hard enough to get the things I get; because I’m not poor I don’t taste what real hard work is and have the same appreciation for things that poor kids do; because I’m not poor, I am not okay with failure; because I’m not poor, it’s not that impressive when I do good things; because I’m not poor, I don’t make the news when I get into a good college; because I’m not poor, I’m not that ‘special’; because I’m not poor, I’m a rich brat and a spoilt kid….
WTF. This makes me feel SO bad. I hate myself and I want to die real bad. I want to disappear. This week has been full of these ‘not good enough’s. Yes, I’m not poor so I don’t know how to really appreciate the things around me and fight for my rights and be happy at little things. Everything goes back to me, MY fault for not doing this and that, because poor kids would.
I want to SH. But I obviously couldn’t do that on my wrist or my arm, it would get noticed. I’d do it on my thighs….if I have the chance. But I still have to be careful. If I can’t be poor, at least I can be in pain.
We are always taught about poor people, movies about them, books about them. What about the rich people? The movies just make poor people seem ‘pitiful’ and that they are so good and so hard working and should be respected. In contrast, in those movies, they make rich and white people seem like bitches. Rich people are mean and terrible and ungrateful and not worthy and all… But that’s not who we are?! Where are the movies where rich people are nice? And kind? And smart? And caring?
I’m just really annoyed. I want to die…why are we, rich people watching movies and learning about poor people’s lives and all~ Yes we know they struggle. But we struggle equally too. We ALL have our struggles. So why only make movies about them and ‘praise’ them and ‘make their stories known’?
The Unspoken Truth 